RCCM

I have been on more “diets” than I care to think about. Some crazy, some less crazy. Atkins worked – but I could only stay on it for limited amounts of time. Cravings for pastries, etc. were BAD on Atkins. Our last Atkins adventure ended with doughnuts. We had been on Atkins for about 3 weeks. We had both lost quite a bit of weight – like 10+ lbs each. One night, someone on the Food Network made doughnuts. Then, there was a grocery store ad for doughnuts. Then I think I saw someone eating doughnuts or mentioning them. I literally lost control. Looking back, it is quite comical. At the time, though, you would have thought Evan and I were rabid dogs. I talked him into going to the store to get doughnuts. “We’ll go right back on Atkins tomorrow,” I told him. It didn’t take too much convincing. We drove together to Fry’s where we bought 2 dozen old-fashioned glazed and RAN to the car. Before we were out of the parking lot, we had both eaten 3. A literal doughnut-fest. Crumbs flying everywhere – hands to mouths and back to doughnuts – complete loss of humanity. That was a true low-point for us. I haven’t been back down the Atkins road since then, mainly because I knew it would end badly.

Nutrisystem? Been there, done that. Jenny Craig? Same. Done vegetarian, only exercising, trying to not think about food, and, more often than not, Weight Watchers. To be honest, Weight Watchers wins my vote. The problem with any of it, though is if you want to cheat, you can. With all of these things, it is not only eating right and exercising, but the self-control and mastery. That is the piece I’ve been missing. I can only go so long on sheer will.

In the recipe for weight-loss, it is easy to note that things like movement and vegetables belong. I think it is obvious to everyone that sugar should be in moderation and spinach becomes a staple. Then it starts getting a bit fuzzy. It’s the mental piece that breaks down. I think that is why even some people on shows like The Biggest Loser gain weight back. If your weight is an outward reflection of a self-numbing, until you figure out how to deal with whatever is creating the need to numb, whatever else you do won’t last.

At work, we do what is called Root Cause/Countermeasure. RCCM for short. Essentially, it is a way to fix something that is broken. And there are short-term countermeasures and long-term. Band-aids and real fixes. And during my time here, I’ve seen some short-term countermeasures that have screwed things up worse than before. I think that’s how my life has been. I’ve been “dieting” without really asking the questions to find out the root cause. I’ve thought about what that thing was, but I haven’t been able to find it. With Brad and Scott’s help, I can figure it out. One thing I have learned is that HOPE is a part of it. When I lose hope, (much like after the doughnut frenzy) I lose motivation. I lose will. One thing I have right now is hope. And I am holding on to it for dear life.